No Island Paradise
by Stormer
Summary: Would Peter Blake’s dream of a life of blissful romance have come true if he had succeeded in kidnapping Jennifer and Abby Horton and taking them to an island hideaway? Not if I had my way!
1. Chapter 1: Tropical Misery

Disclaimer: The characters in this story aren't mine; they belong to the makers of the soap _Days Of Our Lives_. I have altered Jennifer's name slightly because she's married to Peter, though not by choice. She thinks of herself as Jennifer Horton Devereux.

Note: This won't be particularly long, maybe one more chapter, or two. I just wanted to paint a little picture of what might've happened if Peter had managed to take Jennifer after all (I am Australian, and what's more I am _West _Australian, so we are very behind with the _Days of our Lives _plotlines. *g*).

**No Island Paradise**

**_Tropical Misery_**

Jennifer Horton Blake leaned against the banister on the deck of her eastern wing, closing her eyes briefly to enjoy the feel of a soft breeze on her skin. It reminded her of a night long ago, when she and Jack had stood together on a deck much like this one, entwined in one another's arms. Yes, there were similarities between then and now, but all in all that night in the past was a world away. So far away she often found herself wondering if it had ever really happened at all, or had merely been her imagination.

Once upon a time she might have wept on a day like this, an anniversary that meant nothing to her captor but everything to her. But those days were long gone, the days where she would allow herself to break down for him to see. She had long since learned to keep her sorrow to herself, for usually she would not give him the satisfaction of seeing her show _any _emotions, even negative ones. Sometimes strange moods took her, where she wanted him to see how much agony she was in, but only rarely.

She had grown sadly accustomed to her existence here on the island, in Peter's secret hideaway – what was worse was that she had grown resigned to the fact that she would be here forever. She had held out hope for quite some time in the beginning, either of escape or rescue. Yet she had learned in the end just how isolated she and Abby were out here. Nobody would rescue her, and reunite her with her beloved family. All she had was Abby, and the little girl had become her only link to sanity. Abby meant the world to her, and it had required Peter's dastardly act of abduction to make her realise just how much.

The little girl was nearly eight years old by now – her real father had missed her previous three birthdays, an intolerable fact that Jennifer tried to ignore most of the time. Abby was growing into a marvellously beautiful woman, though there were still a few years yet before she became too weighed down with the burdens of womanhood. Those burdens would be all the more great here on the island.

_In this hideaway, she'll never know what it is like to be a woman in the real world_, Jennifer mourned silently, maintaining an emotionless mask even as she wailed inwardly. _She'll never go on a date, or to a school prom, or get married. Thanks to Peter, Abby will spend her life here, and by the time that monster finally dies it will be too late for her to start over anywhere else. We are his prisoners, and he doesn't care how much we hurt._

When she didn't feel as if she were drowning in silent sorrow, Jennifer felt like she was burning up with rage. She had never hated someone as much as she hated Peter Blake, who had not only torn her from the hub of her family, ending her career as a television personality and investigative reporter, but had also forced her into marriage by drugging her. Officially she was, according to local custom, Mrs Peter Blake, but she always thought of herself as Jennifer Horton Devereux.

The hatred she felt for Peter was quite indescribable, and yet it only did damage to her – Peter didn't seem affected by it in the least. It was more that he didn't even recognise it, Jennifer supposed. He didn't yet realise that she not only did not love him and never would, but also quite despised him. The Dimeras had always had a tough time comprehending the fact that sometimes people could not be manipulated or forced into loving them. Peter was no exception, and he clung onto his hope with infuriating and frightening tenacity. She had only realised during her time with him on the island just how insane and deluded he really was.

Sometimes she found herself hoping he would wake up to reality and would give up his quest to win her over, returning her to her former existence in the United States. But she only indulged in such daydreams in her moments of weakness, when she forgot to be strong for her daughter. Those moments came more and more rarely as time went on. Most of her time was spent with her daughter, or staring blankly at the walls.

Speaking of walls, she felt claustrophobic even out here in the open, as if thick windowless walls were closing in around her steadily. She gulped in some air, inhaling deeply, and closed her eyes again before slowly exhaling. It was supposed to be a calming exercise, but sometimes it didn't work, and she was left literally choking. It worked this time, and she placed a hand to her chest as she turned to go back inside. In spite of her brain-deadening existence here on the island, with no stimulating projects to sink her teeth into, she tried to make herself believe she had important things to do.

*          *          *

Dinner that evening was the usual quietly strained affair. Jennifer hoped, as she always did, that Abby didn't pick up on too much of the undercurrents. People always assumed children were relatively unaware, but not so long ago Jennifer herself had been a child, and she remembered even now the feeling of being underestimated by adults. She remembered, and acted accordingly with Abby, assuming the girl was not completely naïve.

It had taken almost a year for Jennifer to ignore her bitterness enough to let Peter make small talk with Abby. Of course she was very careful at all times about how much time she let him spend with the girl, and she always reminded Abby of her real father, Jack, and what a wonderful – if infuriating – man he had been. She didn't want Abby influenced in any way by the Dimera curse, and if Peter ever did anything to hurt or corrupt her daughter, she would kill him with her bare hands. But Abby, stranded here on this island away from all that she had known, deserved to be spared some of the misery her mother lived with at all moments of the day. If she had to hide her own utter abhorrence of Peter Blake for her daughter's sake, then she would do so.

"What would you like for dessert tonight, Abby?" Peter asked, leaning forward on the table and peering intently at the little girl. He smiled, and Jennifer knew that in his own twisted way, he did love the little girl – as he "loved" Jennifer. The problem with Dimera love was that it was always selfish, where Jennifer had grown up knowing the selfless kind of love her family and good friends gave her. That was the kind of love the Dimeras had never known.

The closest Peter and his sister Kristen, who while named Blake were Dimeras at heart, had come to that pure kind of love had been with their respective spouses. Kristen had had a great gift in John, until she ruined it with her schemes and lies, while Jennifer had been Peter's redeemer, until his true nature had been exposed. For both Blake children, even those brief tastes of real love had not been enough in the long run – both Peter and Kristen had proven themselves to be rotten to the core. Since those days, and since the start of her existence here on the island, Jennifer had come to believe nothing could ever change them. They were what they were, and the world had to accept it, as did she. She just wished it were easier for her.

Perhaps it _would _be, if she weren't a prisoner here, separated eternally from all but one of those she loved. In a way she was glad Abby was here with her, but only for her own sake – if she could choose, she would send Abby back to her father and other family in Salem in an instant, so that the girl might have a normal life. Even a life without one's mother was better than the isolated life Abby led here, wasn't it? If Jennifer ever got the chance to send Abby away, she would do it.

Watching Peter now, getting too much enjoyment for her liking out of the current situation, Jennifer could still not believe some of the things he had done in the past while trying to keep her love. All his efforts had been geared towards making her see him as something he could never be – a good man with a good heart. He had tried to make her resent Jack for warning her off him, and worst of all had purposefully made her mother Laura look mentally unstable – had actually _risked _her mother's health! – to counteract the older woman's claims of Dimera-style deception. It was these two things that plagued Jennifer most these days. She had wasted so much time with Peter, time that could've been spent with Jack, and now it was too late for her. If only she could turn back time.

Time could not be manipulated anymore than a Dimera could be found to be acting in anyone's interests but his or her own. Both of those things were just rules of nature.

Peter leaned across the table, bringing his head closer to Jennifer's, and murmured softly, "After dessert, you and I will go for a walk. It's really beautiful out there, Jenn. You'll love it." He watched her for a moment, and then added, "I want to talk to you alone."

She merely stared at him for a moment before glancing at Abby. She hadn't realised that dessert had arrived. Before her sat a small bowl full of chocolate pudding and ice cream. She ignored it and smiled at Abby, who smiled back excitedly. Chocolate pudding was this week's favourite – Jennifer wondered glumly what next week's choice would be.


	2. Chapter 2: A Small Change

Disclaimer: same as in chapter 1 – characters aside from the maid aren't mine *g*

**No Island Paradise**

**_A Small Change_**

With Abby safely in the maid Cassandra's care – Jennifer trusted the woman, though she couldn't quite say why – Jennifer and Peter headed outside, making their way down to the beach. It wasn't the romantic outing onlookers might have assumed, if there had _been _onlookers, but the reality was that they _were _married, no matter how much it pained Jennifer to admit it.

He reached out and took her hand, and she let it lie there in his large one, limply. She never really _held _his hand – only let him hold hers. In a way this was more effective than yanking it away, as she had done for a long time in the beginning, because it let him think she felt nothing at all for him, and was not affected by his touch.

While in reality she did feel something for him – hatred, disgust – she preferred to make him think that her feelings towards him were completely neutral. She could see in his eyes sometimes that he did see this – he was disappointed, but eternally desirous. He never seemed to give up hope that she would love him someday, though he seemed less adamant these days, after years of failure to win her over. None of this comforted her.

"You're quiet tonight," Peter said softly, and she glanced at him. He wasn't looking at her. He was staring at the ground as he walked, looking pensive. She set her jaw as he squeezed her hand. She let it remain there limply. She said nothing.

"What'd you do today?" he asked, clearly not ready to tackle the really important issues yet. He wanted to beat around the bush a little. She'd seen this before, and no doubt the evening would end with no progress whatsoever between them. As usual, she would go to sleep with an overcrowded mind and an aching heart, subconsciously longing for what she had long ago decided she could never have. As usual she would awake the next morning with no reason to drag herself out of bed but her daughter.

"I stared into the distance," Jennifer said dully, her steps dragging a little more as each moment passed. "I stared at the wall. I played with Abby a little." She was not going to give him an easy time of it. She was not going to make him see hope where there was none. She now lived to prove him wrong.

"Jenn, please," Peter murmured, his voice cracking. He stopped in his tracks when they were quite near the end of the sandy path and turned her to face him. "Please don't be like this. You know I'd do anything for you. Why are you being like this?"

She stared at him, letting him see the complete lack of love in her eyes, and the sadness. Her hating him had never done much good, but when he saw her sad he really got stung. She tried to show him her sadness as often as she could these days.

"I miss the old days, Jenn…when we'd talk and talk…and laugh… When we'd just look at one another and know we'd share our love forever."

"Those days were a lifetime ago, Peter," Jennifer said lifelessly. "We can't get them back, no matter what you do. Particularly not when only one of us _wants _them back. What we had is gone forever."

"It can exist again!" Peter said vehemently, eyes shining with a passion that made her skin crawl. He was almost on fire with it – with what he perceived as his love for her. "You just have to give me a chance, Jenn. We've been here so long…I was sure it would've changed by now. I don't understand why you aren't giving us a chance."

She sighed in frustration, letting her emotions get the better of her in spite of how hard she'd tried to keep her cool. "Peter, why can't you see?" she exclaimed, her eyes begging him to do so. "I will never love you. I never could, after all that you did to my family and I. "Don't you understand? Time won't change the way I feel. We've been here _years,_ Peter, and not _once _have I been truly happy!"

That brought him up short. He was looking at her in disbelief, handsome in a way she could never find appealing – he was the most repulsive man she had ever met, taking after his adoptive father in too many ways for comfort. She could not believe she had once loved him, given her _heart _to him. _Then again_, she reasoned, _it wasn't him I fell in love with back then. It was someone who didn't exist…or at least someone who doesn't exist now. Peter tried hard to be a good man, but in the end he couldn't run far enough from the Dimera curse._

She had begun walking and now padded across the sand, gazing out on a black sea. Sometimes she found small moments of serenity as she walked along the beach, but not this night. No matter what she said to Peter, he still clung to his desperate dreams. Every day she grew more convinced that she would be here forever, and every day it grew less easy to tolerate the notion of spending her life here.

"Jenn, what is it you want?" Peter asked out of the darkness, and it was the first she realised he had stayed with her as she walked. But of course he had – he never left her side if he could help it, at least not when she was outdoors. "Tell me what you wish for and I'll grant it in a second."

"You're a liar," Jennifer said softly, her voice trembling with an unexpected threat of tears. "You just lie and lie…but why should that surprise me? It doesn't disappoint me either, since I never expected more of you."

She was speaking so softly that she wasn't sure he had heard. But when he pulled her around to face him, once again dictating her actions, he leaned closer and repeated his question. "Tell me what you want. Please."

She stared at him for a long time, at a man she'd once thought she knew, and for a moment in time lost the will to make use of every little opportunity to show him her misery. For once all she wanted was to collapse in the sand and weep. Yet she stayed silent as she formulated her answer for him.

"I want to go home," she whispered, but she knew he heard. "I want to see my family again. I want to see my mother, my grandmother… She's growing old, Peter. What if I never see her again? What if the last time I saw her was that night I left her place and we both thought everything would be fine? And Abby… She needs her grandmother, her aunts and uncles and cousins…" Jennifer blinked back tears and said more strongly, "These are things I fear every single day. Losing more of the precious time I have on this earth with my family… Seeing Abby grow up alone and isolated, _stunted_. I want to go home, Peter, because this isn't home to me."

He was hurt, as the look in his eyes showed, but she didn't let him break her gaze. He would have to be mentally retarded not to realise at this moment how fervently she meant what she said – how much of a fact her unhappiness was. While she had long ago given up thinking that one day her pleas would make a difference, she now got some small satisfaction in knowing she had done all she could.

Eventually he sighed, and half turned away. He contemplated the sand for a moment before saying wearily, "I wish things could've been different. I wish you had given it a chance. I could've made you so happy…"

Her pulse quickened at this strange turn of events. He had never before reacted this way to her words – it could mean many things that he did so now, but she wasn't sure whether it was bad or good. She feared to find out, and yet she knew she had to.

"Let's go back," Peter said suddenly, clearly changing the subject. "I want to put Abby to bed."

The fine hairs on Jennifer's skin rose in apprehension.


	3. Chapter 3: A Dimera? It CAN’T Be!

Note: Also, this won't go much farther. I don't have much to say. *G* It's already gone beyond what I thought. Anyway. One more chapter tops, unless I get sudden inspiration for what happens next. Thanks for reviewing, dudes! :) 

**No Island Paradise  
_A Dimera? It CAN'T Be!_**

Over the next few days nothing amiss happened. Jennifer wondered why. She noticed that Peter was unusually distant, no longer going out of his way to be with her twenty four hours a day, but she wasn't sure if this was a good thing or not – Peter had always been a dangerous man, willing to do whatever it took to get what he wanted – would he go so far as to harm her and Abby? She had to admit the possibility, though it terrified her. 

Back on the evening of their beachside stroll under the stars, they had returned to the resort – for that was what it was, far beyond the scale of even the most extravagant house Jennifer had seen back home – and he had gone with the maid Cassandra to put Abby to bed. Jennifer, of course, had followed hot on his heels, after all these years still unwilling to leave him alone with her daughter, even though she knew he would never hurt her. 

That night, as on most nights, Abby was disturbingly receptive to Peter's kindness, and Jennifer despaired. No doubt the girl had been too young at the time of the kidnapping to realise what was happening. Perhaps she had even forgotten the role Peter had played in separating her from her real father. Jennifer did try at all times to keep the memories – the ones of Jack and Laura and Alice – fresh in the girl's mind, but maybe her efforts were not enough anymore. How could Abby stay wary of Peter when her memories of her earlier childhood were fast fading? 

Jennifer realised on that night that she was helpless to prevent the inevitable. It scared her tremendously, but it also fuelled her anger. She said nothing to Peter, though. 

In the days after the beachside stroll Peter spent a lot of time with Abby, playing games with her in the massive den, spoiling her more than he ever had before. He looked sad all the time, though he disguised it quite well whenever he caught Abby looking at her. 

Jennifer usually hovered in the background, keeping a close eye on proceedings even though she would've liked to be as far Peter as she could manage. She was disturbed by the way Peter was acting – as if a departure was nigh and he was getting in all the quality time he could before it arrived. What on earth was he planning? Should Jennifer take Abby and hide out in the surrounding jungle? It might be safer than being here with Peter, if he was finally cracking. What if he was planning to murder the two of them? Would even Peter Blake be capable of that? 

In the back of her mind Jennifer prepared a plan of escape, even though she knew that once out in the jungle she'd have no resources whatsoever. She and Abby would be completely alone. _At least we'll still be breathing_, she thought as she watched Abby giggling over Peter's silly antics. 

* * *

"Do you like your pie?" Peter asked Abby, leaning forward to peer more closely at the little girl. 

Abby nodded vigorously and murmured, "Yes." She smiled shyly at Peter. Peter smiled lovingly back, and Jennifer's skin crawled. 

"I thought we'd watch two of your favourite movies after dessert," Peter said, "and have popcorn and sodas and other special treats." 

Jennifer's apprehension peaked – Peter was really going all-out on spoiling Abby tonight. Did that mean this was the last night he was giving her? 

Abby exclaimed excitedly over Peter's suggestion, and in her eyes shone real happiness. Jennifer was appalled on the one hand, and overjoyed on the other. At least her daughter could find moments of happiness in this nightmare. Jennifer wouldn't let herself believe that Abby was happy most of the time. Even if she was, she didn't know how much happier she could've been if left in Salem. Jennifer reached out and touched her daughter's silken blonde hair, pressing her lips together against imminent tears. _Tonight, we'll get out of here,_ she decided. _When Peter leaves the room, we'll slip out. I won't let him hurt you worse than he already has. _

Dinner and dessert were consumed, and then the trio moved into the enormous lounge room where they settled down for the first movie. Cassandra and another young maid were back in the kitchens, seeing to the food preparation. Unusually, Peter wasn't his usual enthusiastic self. This strange new mood of his seemed to be dragging on and on. Jennifer saw no reason why this might be – unless what she had said to him before on the beach had actually sunk in. It was a thought that was too amazing to contemplate. 

She waited for an opportunity to slip out with Abby, but none came. Peter stayed right where he was. The food was delivered to them, smelling so good but bringing Jennifer no comfort. Abby liked it well enough, but even Peter didn't get his usual amount of enjoyment out of seeing Abby happy. _That_ was a sure sign that something was very wrong – more so than usual. 

The credits began to roll on the first film and even now Jennifer had had no time alone with Abby, in which to make her hasty exit. Her apprehension was growing, goose bumps breaking out frequently on her skin in spite of the fact that it was hardly cold at this time of year, and she shivered on and off. She edged closer to Abby and tucked the girl into her protectively. She glanced more frequently at Peter, but still he seemed distracted. 

"Can we watch the next one now, Daddy?" Abby asked in her high voice, and despair stabbed at Jennifer's heart. Since when had her little girl been calling this monster daddy? It was just not right! 

Peter didn't answer. Jennifer stared at him in shock. He wasn't ignoring the girl, surely – it seemed like he just didn't hear her. 

"Peter, Abby is talking to you," Jennifer said coldly. After a moment the man twitched, and finally seemed to come back to earth. 

"I'm sorry," he said, slightly foggily. "What was it? What'd you say, sweetheart?" 

He was talking to Abby, not Jennifer. 

"I want to watch the next movie." 

"Oh. Of course," Peter said, shifting forward on the couch and rubbing his forehead. "Of course. In a moment. But first I have to tell you something. It's something…something very important. I think you will be happy eventually." He didn't sound like he thought it was a happy thing at all, and that gave Jennifer cause for concern. Then again, things that caused Peter happiness usually caused others' pain, so maybe his current misery was a good sign. 

Jennifer waited with baited breath, knowing this was the moment. She prepared to launch herself off the couch and take Abby with her. 

"You're going on a trip tomorrow," Peter said softly, looking sadly at Abby as Jennifer got to her feet. She went to pull Abby up with her when she heard Peter's next words, and paused. "You're going to go on a plane for a holiday." 

Abby looked excited, even as Jennifer began to stare in disbelief. Peter finally raised his eyes to meet Jennifer's gaze, and in those eyes she saw resignation, sadness, and love. She saw none of the Dimera madness she was used to seeing. In fact, she realised, she hadn't seen any of it for the last few days, when he'd been acting so strangely. It made no sense, since madness didn't just dissipate like that. But no matter what logic told her, she knew what she was seeing. She wasn't quite as sure about what she was hearing, though. 

Peter asked Abby to go and put the next movie on, telling her he'd explain more about her holiday later on, and the little girl did so with a bounce in her step. She sang all the way to the video player. 

Jennifer hastily moved closer to Peter, though she couldn't bring herself to move too close, and leaned down to speak with him in whispers. 

"What is going on?" she asked. 

He hesitated, before saying softly, "I'm granting you your fondest wish." And he turned away from her, indicating clearly that the conversation was over for the moment. 

Jennifer sat back down in a daze, and watched numbly as Abby returned to sit beside her. She was almost oblivious to the little girl snuggling in beside her; she was too busy struggling to understand what had just happened. Was Peter really going to send she and Abby back home? 


	4. Chapter 4: Loss Of Life

Note: Nearly there. One more chapter, tops. Hope it's not boring ya *g*

**No Island Paradise**

**_Loss of Life_**

Peter Blake went through the motions, but he found it very hard to pretend he was still alive even for Abby's sake. His Jennifer was a lost cause – she didn't want him, and never would again. She once had, that was a truth neither of them could deny – even Jack Devereux would admit it under duress – but that was in the past. It'd taken Peter a long time to realise as much.

He had had his wish in the beginning, to spirit Jennifer and Abby away to his island paradise, but from there on things hadn't gone as planned. He'd been determined at first, so sure of his love for Jennifer and hers for him – buried under an animosity inspired by meddling Horton family members and pesky so-called friends of hers – that he knew any hurdle could be overcome. He'd pulled out all stops to win her love, and had swiftly won Abby over, but what he hadn't reckoned on was Abby's mother not responding at all to his efforts. In the past, back in Salem, she had fallen under his spell, but this time his charms had no effect on her. Still he persisted.

Time had worn on and he had made no real progress, though now and then he had seen what he perceived to be small signs that he was moving in the right direction. Looking back, he wondered if he hadn't completely imagined such signs. He had been a desperate man after all, particularly after he had learned that he had lost his sister. Kristen's untimely demise had shocked him to the core, and devastated him – his only flesh and blood in the world, gone. But it had also inspired him to fight harder for Jennifer's love, and he had thrown himself all the more devotedly into that task. Even so, he had made no progress; Jennifer's stare had remained passionless.

As he stood at one of the many windows in his mansion, catching a spectacular view of the windswept beach outside, more realisations dawned on him. For one, he realised that where Jennifer was concerned he'd been living in the past, remembering only the good times the two of them had shared. She had been living in the present – in the time after she learned of the things he had done to keep her love. While he refused to consider the grim present, she refused to consider the good parts of the past. In this way the two of them had been equally stubborn. This he saw with the gift of hindsight.

He supposed it was natural that Jennifer would have been remembering the things she saw as bad in him, rather than all the good that remained. Sometimes these days she said that he had _no_ good left inside – that he had spent it all in kidnapping her and Abby – but he had never believed she was being entirely truthful. Times were changing.

He had always had a knack for justifying the bad things he had done in his life; he still believed that his motives had been admirable and understandable; but when Jennifer didn't feel that way, there was no use in him continuing to. He could talk to her till he was blue in the face and still nothing would change. For that reason he was going to make what was for him the ultimate sacrifice.

Everything had changed after that talk with Jenn on the beach a few nights ago. He had never seen her look at him with such raw emotion. It wasn't the kind of feeling he'd hoped to see in her eyes since he took her and Abby away with him years ago – it was shattering. In that moment his glass bubble had burst into a thousand shards, showering him with a stinging rain that made him flinch. He had been altered right then and there, on the spot.

Ever since, he had been avoiding her, at least emotionally. While he would obviously have to be around her, because she never let Abby out of her sight, and he was determined to spend as much time with his daughter before he had to say goodbye, he had managed to distance himself from Jenn for his own protection. Sometimes he caught Abby looking at him with a tinge of worry, and he hastily forced himself to be a better father, more attentive, for her. Children were always the main victims of their parents' disagreements, or so Peter had come to believe over the years, and even he knew better than to punish Abby for something she couldn't control.

_Even I_, he thought wryly, gazing out the window. He wasn't even sure what he was looking at anymore. Once upon a time he had loved the view from these windows, but even back in those days of hope they had seemed empty – lacking that familial touch he had craved all his life. That craving had been particularly prominent in Kristen's wake, and he had been fully prepared to have it sated. Jennifer and Abby had been his destiny; they had been going to transform everything so completely that he'd be left spinning. He'd been prepared, and had waited with open arms.

Jennifer had shunned his arms. She had shunned every part of him. Even though it might have made him angry on another day, it hadn't made him angry back on the beach a few days ago. Nor did it make him angry now, only incredibly sad. He was so empty without her. His life would be worthless when she was gone.

But go she would, for he was sending her.

"As it was almost from the beginning, so it will be in the end," he murmured darkly, and turned from the window into the shadows behind him. His eyes found the nearest mantle piece, and strangely were drawn immediately to the portrait of his departed sister, Kristen. He moved closer to it and his eyes stung with unshed tears. Why now was he feeling this loss so keenly? _Because I'm about to lose everything, that's why_, he thought, trailing a finger down the frame of Kristen's portrait. _It's reminding me of what I've lost in the past._

In a way, though, perhaps he'd gain something when his last reason for living had disappeared. _Perhaps I'll be with you soon, Krissy, one way or another. Not by choice, surely, but if fate brings me to you…I won't complain._

He shrugged to rid himself of this horrible feeling of grief, and headed for the door. In his last hours with his daughter, he'd stay strong for her. She, unlike her mother, still needed him.

*           *           *

"Come on, sweetie," Jennifer murmured, keeping a soft touch on her daughter's back as the two of them headed for the nearest flight of stairs. Jennifer carried her biggest suitcase in her other hand, and Abby held her own carry bag – a lion-headed thing that Peter had given her for last year's birthday. Of course Jennifer had been loathe to let her keep anything Peter gave her, but what other gifts would a little girl get in a place like this? There had to be some give and take when a woman was fighting to keep herself and her daughter sane.

"Mommy, where are we going?" Abby asked in her softly piping voice, pausing to peer back and up at her mother.

Jennifer too paused, crouching down beside the little girl and smiling brightly. "It's a nice surprise," she said with forced enthusiasm, hoping she was right and that Peter's plans weren't sinister. _You had better be doing right by us, for once in your life, _Jennifer told him silently, though he was not nearby currently and she could have spoken aloud. _I'd sooner kill you than let you hurt my baby even more._

"Daddy said we were going on a trip," Abby responded, eyes wide and shining.

"He's not your daddy, honey," Jennifer said softly, repeating what she had said a million times already. Abby looked hurt, and Jennifer added, "I'm sorry, sweetheart, but you have to remember what the truth is. He's Peter, not daddy. He does…care for you…but you and I don't belong here. You have a daddy in another place who loves you to pieces."

"Why doesn't that daddy come and get us?" Abby asked, frowning.

"He…" Jennifer hated this – not knowing what on earth to say to her little girl. It was torture, trying to find the right answers that wouldn't be psychologically damaging one way or another. Jennifer had always tried to be fair, even if that meant refraining from insulting Peter in her daughter's hearing. "Your daddy will find us one day."

"Is he resting?" Abby inquired.

"What do you mean, sweetie?"

"Is he resting from looking for us?"

Jennifer sighed inwardly. "No, baby. Daddy never stopped looking for us. And remember grandma? She used to pick you up and twirl you around – you were her princess! And great-grandma…"

Jennifer's voice grew softer as she and Abby drew farther away. It would be the last time her voice graced this portion of the mansion that had been commissioned by Peter Blake all those years ago.


	5. Chapter 5: Resigned

**No Island Paradise**

**_Resigned_**

"Peter?" Jennifer called for the third time. There was as yet no sign of the man. But it wasn't like him to be late, or to forget something he'd said he would do. He must be around here somewhere.

Sure enough he opened a door just down the hall and walked out, glancing both ways before spotting Jennifer and Abby. He looked dazed and dishevelled, as if he'd been dozing in an armchair and had only just awoken. Jennifer had never seen him look that way. The Blake children rarely allowed themselves to lose their self-control that way.

"Ah…good morning Abby," he murmured, and smiled faintly as he began to walk towards them. "Jennifer." He barely acknowledged her as he bent down in front of her daughter. "How did you sleep, sweetheart?"

"Good," Abby piped. "But where are we going?"

Peter was still smiling, but the sadness was radiating from him. "You're going on that little holiday I told you about. It's going to be a lot of fun."

"Are you coming with me?" Abby asked.

Peter hesitated, and then shook his head. It seemed that he made a decision right there, crouching in the hallway. Jennifer wondered what it had been.

"No, sweetheart, I'm not coming with you. It's a special trip just for you and your mommy."

Abby looked confused, and Peter said, "Come on, sweetheart. Let's go for a walk on the beach. We have a few hours before you leave."

"But daddy, why aren't you coming with us?" Abby persisted.

Peter took her hand as he straightened, and motioned for Jennifer to follow as he led Abby down the hall. _As if I would have let you take her off alone, anyway_, Jennifer thought to herself, but there wasn't much spite in the thought. She was too confused about current events to feel her usual disgust for this man. Particularly if her suspicions about what he was planning were right. Those suspicions balanced on that one statement he had made – that he was going to grant her fondest wish. She had told him a few days before what that wish was, and if he was speaking literally, then she was right to have hope. She wasn't yet willing to let go of her reservations entirely, but she knew that even with that precaution she would be devastated if she turned out to be wrong in her suspicions. The pain would begin all over again. _Please, God, don't let me be wrong._

Peter said gently, "Sweetheart, this trip is for you and your mom, because it's a gift from me to you. A gift is meant…is meant to be something you give to others. Not something that you take for yourself."

Jennifer very nearly stumbled at that – she couldn't believe the nerve of this man, taking what she had always told him and making it his own sentiment, therefore making himself the good guy! How dare he try to ingratiate himself to her daughter like that? Oh yes, she had her anger back.

"When will we come back?" Abby asked.

Peter thought for a while, and stayed quiet even when Abby tugged insistently on his hand, but finally he said, "You'll come back when you want to, sweetheart."

Jennifer analysed that response as she continued to walk, and confirmation hit her like a lightning strike. Her heart began to soar, quite against her will, and she thought almost feverishly, _He's letting us go. He's letting us go back home! He's granting me my fondest wish!_

Her doubts continued to cling on in some small capacity, but they were fast losing ground.

*          *          *

Jennifer took the ultimate risk during the next hour or so, probably foolishly putting her trust in a seemingly transformed Peter Blake. She couldn't say why she did it, only that she felt so sure that she was right about what was going to happen today. The risk she took was letting Peter make Abby smile and laugh; giving him, of all people, one last gift. He didn't really deserve such a concession, but she didn't mind today of all days. He'd get his just desserts soon enough; for now she would behave like the merciful human being her family had brought her up to be, and show Peter Blake the kind of kindness he'd not known in aeons.

Somehow, even considering all that he had done in the past, she managed to take pity on him. A part of her knew for certain that she would never see him again. Or, if she did, it'd be when she was standing on the other side of the prison bars. He would lose the family he had coveted for so long, even if Jennifer had not considered them a family since the dissolution of their real marriage years ago. 

Inside a frantic voice reined her in, or tried to. _Don't trust him. Just because he's looked so sad, doesn't mean he's suddenly not a Dimera. Just because he said those things doesn't mean he's not fooling you – he's good at lying, remember?_ But no matter how hard that voice fought for control of her, the other voice, the voice of hope and joy and anticipation, maintained its supremacy. She had perhaps never behaved this foolishly in her life before.

An hour and a half after they had met in the hallway and ventured outside, Peter, Jennifer and Abby made their way up the beach, leaving a series of varyingly elaborate sandcastles and other sand sculptures behind. Soon the tide would rush in and obliterate the exhibition of carefully crafted mounds and ridges and concavities. Castles would cave in and fill the moats surrounding them; dolphin bodies would implode; flowers would lose all their petals and become nothing but slightly ridged areas of smooth sand. But for the castles, dolphins and flowers remained, a moving testament to one lost man's impossible dream.

Birds soared over the beach and out onto the water, their cries echoing eerily across the magnificent landscape.

*          *          *

It looked to Jennifer's eyes like a jumbo jet, even though it was only one of those little private planes the likes of Peter Blake could afford. At the sight of it Jennifer's eyes filled with tears, and she quickly took steps to ensure Peter didn't notice. _Am I really coming home to you, Jack? _she wondered as she pressed Abby closer against her. _Am I going to talk with you over tea again, mom?_ Even with her newfound conviction that indeed she would be returning home, it was still hard to fathom. She had grown grimly accustomed to life here on the island – if one could call it a life – and this abrupt change in routine made her dizzy.

"It takes off in forty-five minutes," Peter informed her grimly, standing with his arms hanging loosely at his sides. He looked like he was wondering whether it was worth the effort to breathe. _What is he going to do with his time once we're gone? _Jennifer wondered. _Or will he return to Salem too? HE still has Stefano and Lexie, after all…if not Kristen._ Then she thought, _Why on earth am I even bothering to wonder what he'll do when we're gone? I certainly don't care._

"Isn't it exciting, honey?" Jennifer asked Abby, squeezing the girl's shoulder gently.

Abby nodded, but said nothing. She kept looking at Peter questioningly. Jennifer tried to ignore the obvious connection that lay between the two of them. _It is not fair! _she raged when ignoring it failed. _Peter deliberately forged that bond! He's purposefully usurped Jack's rightful place, and now in the long run he's going to hurt Abby! It's just not fair!_

Jennifer wanted desperately to scoop Abby up into her arms and make a break for the plane, but the gates weren't open yet, and Peter was the one who would be giving the command there. He was in control of everything here in this small airport – Jennifer was, as yet, still dependent on him, as much as it irked her to admit it.

"Your luggage is packed in the cargo hold," Peter said. "Do you want to…have a coffee or something before you board? There's a little café inside the terminal."

Jennifer hesitated, knowing that she had to keep him happy as possible by at least being polite, lest she risk his changing his mind about freeing her and Abby. At the same time, she didn't want to encourage him to think that there was any hope of her loving him again.

"Don't worry about it," Peter said before she could answer. "I understand." And he moved a few steps away and rubbed his face with his hands, wearily.

"It's just that…I like to have a bit of fresh air. It's a nice day outside." Jennifer kicked herself mentally – did she have to sound like she was making an effort? That was the last thing she wanted him to think.

"Of course," Peter said, and they both fell silent again. They stayed that way until boarding time, except when Peter talked to Abby.

*          *          *

When the gates opened, everything happened very fast. Jennifer and Abby were herded towards the plane and invited to board. Peter didn't even come with them. Jennifer glanced back once and saw him exchanging words with one of the pilots. The pilot was nodding profusely, and Peter's face looked grim. _God, let him not be telling the pilot to take us to another hide-out or let the plane crash or shove us out of the open door. Please!_

She and Abby were seated, and told to buckle up. The plane cabin was rather luxurious, with a row of seats on either side of it and a table all the way down the middle. When Jennifer had her belt on, and had secured Abby's in place also, she turned to look out the window and saw that Peter had moved back slightly. He was not going to board the plane. He hadn't even said goodbye.

"You okay, honey?" Jennifer asked Abby, whose faced looked strangely solemn.

The girl nodded, but said, "Yes, but I still don't know where we're going."

"I know, sweetheart," Jennifer murmured. "It's meant to be a surprise." _You are going to love it, my little darling._

She could hardly wait until the plane took off.

*          *          *

As they lifted into the air, Jennifer sat in the spot gripping both of the arm rests with white-knuckled hands. It wasn't that she was scared of flying – more that she was scared that there was some trap she wasn't perceiving, laid by Peter. Nothing presented itself and she had to force herself to relax. It was a big struggle.

She didn't look for Peter on the way up. She studiously faced away from the windows, not wanting to see the island prison anymore. She wanted instead to focus on her destination, trying to picture familiar spots in Salem in her mind. To her panic she couldn't bring any images to mind at first, and she very nearly started crying, thinking, _What has Peter done to me?!?_ in despair. But soon enough the mental block began to crumble, and she let herself smile.

When one of the pilots poked his head in from the cockpit and said, "We'll reach Salem in about seven hours, if you and your little girl wish to have a rest."

That was all Jennifer could take. The dams broke and the tears flowed, no matter how hard she struggled to control herself for Abby's sake.

"Ma'am, are you okay?" the pilot asked with concern. "Can I get you anything?"

Jennifer shook her head, gasping for air as Abby too began to cry. "No, no," she said, "it's alright. Thank you."

"Mommy, what's wrong?" Abby cried, upset by her mother's apparently grief.

"Nothing, honey. Nothing at all. Everything is just fine. These are happy tears."

"Why are you _that _happy?" Abby asked in confusion, hiccuping.

Jennifer laughed loudly, and wiped at her cheeks. "Oh, honey, it's just that we're going to a wonderful place. A wonderful place where it's very hard to be sad." She had come to idealise Salem since her abduction, and now she saw it as a glowing, golden place full of love and warmth and happiness. She knew on one level that her glorified vision of home was relatively inaccurate, but she couldn't bring herself to tarnish it just yet. It was what had sustained her through some of the hardest times, after all.

She drew her daughter into a warm embrace and wept buckets of joy. She was going home, at long last. Her entire body shuddered with exhilaration and relief that the nightmare was nearly over.

Against all odds, she ended up thanking Peter Blake that day, for making what was for him the ultimate sacrifice.

**_The End_**

Note: I am Australian, therefore my spelling is different, but I chose to use American spelling at least in the dialogue, hence my use of the word 'mommy' instead of 'mummy', and so on *g* Just like it to be more authentic I guess.

Anyway, that is it. Let me make sure you know that I didn't mean to glorify Peter there at the end. I just wanted to show that Jennifer recognised how amazing it was that he did what he did.

In reality it's very unrealistic, since Peter and Kristen forgot long ago how to sacrifice themselves for others like that – but I do like things to go MY way sometimes, even if just in my imagination *G*

I am not so sure this was a satisfactory ending. Particularly since I set out to just give a "glimpse" into Jennifer's life on the island, not a happy ending. But anyway… Perhaps you can give me some feedback and I could always try a few different endings, and see which one works. But right now I want to just let this settle, because I think it's about time it was finished *g* Thanks for reading, everyone! :)


End file.
